Mindful Eating Programs and Training

Mindful Eating Programs and Training

Shhh! We have a secret (about binge eating)

Michelle May

Portrait of young woman opening refrigerator at night

Our Mindful Eating Retreat for Emotional Eating and Binge Eating offers an effective treatment for binge eating. We’re not trying to keep that quiet, but in a way, we need to. You see, most people with BED struggle with secret binge eating.

  • They feel guilty and ashamed about their secretive bingeing and go to great lengths to hide their behaviors from others.
  • They experience great distress as a result of their binge eating, but they often fear that seeking help for binge eating disorder might expose their secret.
  • They feel out of control and know they need help, yet the secretive nature of the problem just might prevent them from getting the help they desperately need!

You are not alone!

Ann Marie, one of our retreat participants, said, “We think that we can ‘fix’ this on our own, but the years pass and prove that it’s not true in most cases—it wasn’t in mine.”

During introductions at one of our in-person retreats, one of our participants said she had told her husband she was going to a tennis camp. She brought her racquet and planned to play so it was a sort of half-truth. Another said she had told her husband she was going to a “women’s retreat.” We all laughed when she told us that when he started to ask some questions about what we’d be talking about, she said, “I told him ‘Oh hormones and things’ and that shut him right up!”

We totally get it! That is why we are careful with our receipts and post-registration communications; everything is marked as ME-BE Retreat (no “Binge Eating” mentioned). I guess you could say you are going to a retreat to “learn about me and just be!” And in many ways, that is absolutely true!

Bring your secret binge eating into the light

bring secret binge eating into the lightOnce at the retreat, it’s a whole different story. Over the course of the retreat, their dark secret is brought out into the light – and like this solar powered daisy, they come to life! Participants quickly discover that they are not alone or crazy; the things they do, others do too. They find out that their experiences, feelings, thoughts, and fears are shared by other people. And as they forge deep connections with others who “get” them, they discover how lovable and beautiful they really are. They see it in each other, so they can’t help but begin to believe it about themselves.

Ann Marie explained, “As you sit in small group therapy and hear ‘your’ story over and over, you know that you are truly not alone. Some of the greatest things to come out of the retreat are the friendships and the compassion. You finally have hope.”

Ann Marie said that her retreat experience gave her the confidence to finally share her secret with her husband (still the only other person who knows). “Telling my husband totally released the anxiety I felt about hiding. It was such a great relief. So freeing!”

Far from judging her, he became her ally. “He has become my cheerleader, reminding me all the time how far I’ve come. He even counts my cumulative days without bingeing – well over 350 days since my retreat!”

“Even though initially I felt so embarrassed, my life now is so much better. The physical and emotional healing is unbelievable. I wish I knew then how much better it would be now. Exposing my secrets truly was one my keys to recovery.”

This article has been updated from a previously published version.

Enjoyed this article? Here are three more to help you:

What is the difference between emotional eating and binge eating?

Binge eating disorder and dieting: Often two sides of the same coin

Nicole’s Story: Recovery from Binge Eating Disorder – “I deserve it!”

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4 thoughts on “Shhh! We have a secret (about binge eating)”

  1. Yes! When I attended the Binge Eating retreat a few years back, it was billed to my VISA as “Am I Hungry?” I blacked it out with a marker & told my husband it was a “Writer’s Retreat.” I mentioned that at the retreat–that maybe the billing name could be changed.

    I’m glad to hear it is more innocuous , as my “affair” with Dearest B (Binge) was not known by my husband. He had no idea I was cheating on him with secret & hidden binges.

    1. Yes Suzy, it is often a secret from those you are closest to! (I believe the credit card bill still says “Am I Hungry?” though since that is our legal business name.)

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